Lie In The Grass & Try To Sleep

You smack your lips and stretch. You’ve never felt more relaxed in your life. Flipping off your shoes, you stretch out on the soft grass and close your eyes. In seconds the police are upon you, screaming and dwaring their guns.

“Hey hey…” you mutter, “what’s is all this racket? Can’t you see I’m trying to get some sleep?”

The police wrestle you onto your stomach and cuff you. They drag you to one of the squad cars, heaving you inside. Upon reaching the state prison facility, you are grabbed roughly by the ankles and dragged out onto the pavement. As they hustle you inside, you begin to ponder the great mysteries of life.

Turning to the guard on your left you say, “Don’t you ever wonder about things? You know, life and death, the passage of time, love and celebration?”

He pays no attention to you. A few minutes later you are tossed into a cell, the door clanking shut behind you. A hulking beast of a man steps out of the shadows at the back of the cell. As he approaches he clasps his hands and licks his lips eagerly.

“Mmmmmm,” he murmurs, “and wasn’t that a tasty dish to set before the king…”

Tears stream down your face and you realize that for the first time in your life you truly feel beautiful. You feel wanted. You feel desired. Gazing into this man’s small, beady, muskrat-like eyes, you feel electricity. You feel love. You somehow get the feeling that the two of you are going to be far more than just friends.

And you wouldn’t have it any other way.