POP CULTURE

20 (More) Spectacularly Awful Album Covers

I hope that you will please forgive my inability to stop posting galleries featuring hilariously bad album covers. Please know that I only continue to do this out of a deep and abiding love for the human race. Well that, and also I've also got a number of very serious mental disorders I am unsuccessfully attempting to reign in.But that isn't important right now.

The photos are the reason we're all here, so let's get started.

20 Spectacularly Awful Album Covers

Surely somewhere on this planet there must be an album cover which is so outrageous and unintentionally perverse, that if it were viewed, it would cause a tear in the very fabric of what we know as reality, causing the dimension in which we currently reside to fold in upon itself, and everything in the the known universe to simply blink out of existence.

Thankfully for humanity, I haven't come across this particular album cover yet. But here are 20 that come pretty close.

I Hereby Grant You Permission To Chase Waterfalls

Heed not the warnings of early 90s R&B groups. Waterfalls were placed on this earth by The Lord God for one reason and one reason only: To be chased.

I realize that many of you may have a strong inclination towards "sticking to the rivers and the lakes that you're used to" but what you likely fail to realize is that puttering around in large, stationary pools of liquid, or even travelling with freshwater as it runs towards an ocean can in no way match the vigorous stimulation and emotional fulfillment one can achieve from chasing a waterfall. Not even close.

So if you'd allow me, I'd like to go ahead and refute some of the most common arguments against chasing waterfalls at this time in the hopes of convincing you to go out an experience the joy associated with the pursuance of water which is flowing down a steep grade due to the effects of gravity along with a rapid drop in elevation.

Top 10 Rock & Roll Albums of All Time

Howdy internet fans, it's your old pal Martin "The Baron" Hubley with another top ten list to shake the foundations of your musical knowledge to their very cores! Those of you who know me best will agree that I have one passion and one passion only: Rock & Roll. My naughtiest fantasy is to climb into a hotrod, crank up my fave rock radio station to full, and cruise down the coast, honking at thick & juicy honeys while bobbing my head to the sound of wailing guitars and nonstop drums.

Some say rock ain't what it used to be, but I tend to disagree. There are plenty of high quality rock albums out there, you just have to know where to look (namely: right here in this very article).

Fair Warning: There are going to be some pretty controversial choices in here, as I don't often follow the crowd. But keep reading if you've got the guts, and you'll be rewarded with hours of rock and roll hijinks. That's a promise!

4 of The Stupidest As Seen On TV Products Ever

4 Stupidest Infomercial Products Of All Time

I've always been a big fan of As Seen On TV gadgets. Not in a "wow, this stuff is actually pretty cool and useful" sort of way though. It's more like an "Oh my god, this is the most hilarious piece of crap I have ever seen, I can't even believe it" kind of thing. Even at their very best, infomercial products often offer nothing more than a slightly more expensive way to accomplish a task which wasn't really all that important in the first place (I am looking directly at you, Magic Bullet). Of course, this very fact is exactly what makes them so entertaining.

So let's take a look at four of the dumbest infomercialesque products currently on the market: The Backup, Instant Arm Lift, The Freedom Tray, and Jingle Jugs. Yeah, I know! Even the names are fantastic.

20 Ghastly Celebrity Wax Sculptures

Those of you who have not had the displeasure of visiting a wax museum are missing out on a world of arcane horrors unlike anything you have known. As a small child I had the opportunity to check out Ripley's Wax Museum in San Antonio, an experience which has undoubtedly scarred me for life. To this day I cannot sit on a public toilet without envisioning the crushed wax face of Tom Hanks surging towards me from the murky depths.

But for those of you who have yet to come under the stony gaze of a half melted dummy of Sylvester Stallone, I have compiled these photos.

Google Autocomplete Answers 9 Important Questions

Google Autocomplete Answers Life's Important Questions

Google's autocomplete feature is a tool I often use when I want to get an idea of the general public's feeling or thoughts on a particularly hard-to-research subject. Well maybe not often. More like never. Still it's a fun way to see what the all the idiots in the world are up to.

So here are 9 of the most interesting/disturbing/weird/stupid autocomplete results which have shaken my faith in much of humanity.

The Insane Maury Povich Episode Title Awards

For the third (and final) entry in my hard-hitting fictional awarding of honors to the titles of various daytime television shows I decided to take a look at Maury, which is a talk show which "is often accused by critics of exploiting dysfunctional families, minorities, and the poor, and for embracing and sensationalizing some of the worst stereotypes of American society and behavior [and] some critics denounce it as being even worse than other similar talk shows such as The Jerry Springer Show, due to what is perceived as an insincere sympathy for the guests and using their serious problems for the entertainment and humor of the viewing audience."

So while I'm sure a show of this caliber is sure to have garnered many prestigious awards already, I might as well heap a few more onto the pile. My feeling has always been that you can't overpraise good work.

I Certainly Hope Yoplait Responds to The Complaint Letter I Just Sent

This is the last straw. Last night I couldn't get all of the yogurt I was eating out of the bottom of the container so I reached in with my finger to scoop some out and I cut myself a little bit on the rim. There's only a certain amount of injustice a man (or me) can be subjected to before he snaps. And I've reached that point. By God, I've reached it.

So I'm sending a message to the Fat Cats over at Yoplait corporate expressing my deepest feelings and most intimate of desires with regards to the future of my relationship with their yogurt products. Something has to change. They had better provide adequate explanation about what is being done to address my concerns. If they don't, there is going to be hell to pay.

It's The 78th Annual Shameful Ricki Lake Show Title Awards!

Welcome to the second installment of the 78th Annual "I Give Awards to Shitty Daytime Talk Show" Awards. The wonderful program I have singled out for praise this time around is Ricki Lake. If you are unfamiliar with the show you can find everything you need to know about it here, but this really isn't necessary. After looking over this list you'll likely have a better understanding of what the show was all about than most of the web-footed inbreds who watched it.

The most interesting I found while browsing through lists of episodes is that the writers over at Ricky must've had something of an "Let's all take 10 grams of Mushrooms and make pretend like we're R. Kelly" mindset when it came to naming their shows. Which is to say: They really enjoyed coming up with weird-ass urban limerick excerpts and clumsy sexualized half-puns. So consider this fair warning that list contains plenty of things like "Cut All the Drama. You Aint Nuthin but a Fat Hoochie Momma" and "Your Nasty Addiction Will Make Me Your Ex... Today You Choose Me or Cybersex".

Ugh.