CUSTOMER COMPLAINTS

Might As Well Post These Stupid Customer Complaints I Found

One of my favorite things in the world is reading customer complaints on the internet that appear to have been posted by people who cannot read or write. So here are 10 of the best recent complaints I could find on complaintsboard, an unmoderated, racially-charged, libel choked clusterfuck masquerading "consumer advocacy" website.

Fair warning: As most of these complaints were posted by idiots, many of them contain sexual content, hilarious racism, or multiple instances of misspelled foul language.

10 Absurd & Unsettling Fiverr Posts

The idea behind fiverr is pretty simple: People post activities they're willing to perform for five dollars, and if anyone feels like paying them to do it, they can go right ahead.

There seems to be a decent filtering system in place, because 90% of the posts seem legit (e.g. "I will write a short story for you", "I will make a custom blog theme for you". "I will draw a picture of you" etc), but luckily for me, there are still plenty of insane people and sick freaks posting stuff too.

Here are a few of the strangest pledges I've come across so far.

Stupid Customer Complaints: Final Round

Listen up: I sorted through a bunch more of the ridiculous and absurd customer complaints over at Complaintsboard and have compiled the most interesting ones here for your perusal.

Alright let's go!

Stupid Customers Complain About Food

DEAR SIRS OF MAAM I PURCHASED ONE BK'S BROILER ALSO ONE BOX OF FRIES AT BUGRER KING AND AS I HAVE ASBURGERS I CANT HAVE SALT ON FRIES I ASKED THE YOUNG WOMAN (BLACK!!) TO GIVE ME NO SALT SHE WAS RUDDE TO ME ALSO GAVE ME SALT AND I HAD NOT ONE BUT THREE GRAND MAUL SEZUIRS DUE TO THIS WITCH IS UNNACEPATABLE. HAREV IT YOUR WAY I THINK NOT!!!!!!!!

Even More Complaints From Stupid Customers

What do you want from me, it isn't my fault that I find customer complaints inordinately hilarious. I blame bad genes.

Here are some more pointless complaints from customers which I have pointlessly posted because I am dumb.

12 (More) Puzzling Complaints From Stupid Customers

15 More Puzzling Complaints From Stupid Consumers

PART 1 of this series featured some some of the best customer complaints I could find on my new favorite website: ComplaintsBoard.com. But consumer action does not sleep! There are still plenty of fairly unpleasant people who feel they have been severely wronged by the actions of various Burger King & Safeway employees, and I must help to ensure that their whining voices are heard!

All aboard the payback train. First stop: Justicetown.

15 Puzzling Complaints From Stupid Customers

15 Complaints From Stupid Consumers - Shopping Carts

I'm sure Complaintsboard.com was originally intended to be a website where frustrated consumers could go to report harmful or shady business practices of different retailers, exposing them as frauds and possibly causing them to go out of business.

Unfortunately, it isn't really working out that way. Complaintsboard is less about consumer rights and more about semiliterate adults with learning disabilities who believe a business has wronged them in some petty way pecking out (usually IN CAPS) incomprehensible messages to companies that will never, ever read them. Nothing useful is accomplished, and no one is helped.

So yeah, it's pretty great!