Web Detritus (Week of 08.08.10)

WEB DETRITUS

A decidedly nonessential collection of cool links, weird news stories, and other random things I've exhumed from the rotting corpse of the internet.

This week: The World's Largest Male Breasts, Blood Spatter Analysis 101, Semen Attacks, Vestigial Organs, and of course: More Grown Men In Diapers.

WEIRD NEWS

UPDATE: Man Who Tricked Woman Into Changing His Diaper Appears In Court

A 40-year-old man who tricked caregivers into changing his diapers by pretending he had the emotional maturity of a 5-year-old apologized to a victim in court Monday before pleading guilty to charges of organized fraud. Prosecutors said [the man] told caregivers he was incontinent and hired at least two women to feed him and change his diapers [but] did not pay them the amount he promised.

According to the Brevard County Sheriff's Office, [the man] sometimes would hire women through postings on Craigslist.org. He would call them pretending to be the brother of the disabled man who needed care. He would then show up and pretend to be the man with the disability. The ruse was exposed when a caregiver's husband saw him get into a car and drive off.

Lt. Tod Goodyear who heads the sex crimes unit of the sheriff's office said he believed the man had a fetish where adults want to be fed from bottles and wear diapers.

Chinese Guy No Longer Holds Record For World's Largest Man Breasts

A Chinese man who had the world's biggest man boobs is enjoying a new lease of life after an operation to remove them. Guo Qingpo, 53, from Jiuying village, Dezhou, in northern China's Shandong province, said the surgery had ended a ten year nightmare.

For many years he refused to leave his home after people labelled him a freak or falsely accused him of undergoing transgender surgery.

"[About] two years ago they began to grow outrageously until they were as big as footballs. People would stare at me wherever I went."

Two teams of medical staff worked side-by-side, each removing one breast, and the operation was over in six hours.

After a month of recovery, Guo checked out of the hospital saying he felt like a new man.
"Never again shall I fear others calling me a she male," he said.

Man Suspected In Semen Attack

Authorities in Maryland say a man accused of squirting semen from a bottle onto two female shoppers has been linked to three more cases.

[The man] was arrested and charged with spraying the fluid on a shopper at a Giant Food store in Gaithersburg [and] was also charged in a similar incident at a Michaels craft store in Gaithersburg.

Gaithersburg Officer Dan Lane said [the man] has been linked to three additional cases at the same Giant store..

Collector Claims Collection of Trash Is Worth $16,000

A[n extremely] British man said his collection of empty chip packets [garbage], dating back as far as 1984, has a total estimated worth of about $16,000. Dave Valentine, 32, of Bexhill-on-Sea, who started his collection with a bag of BBQ beef Hula Hoops in 1984, said the collection also includes bags from defunct brands Griddles and Ringos.

"[Morons] love the nostalgia of looking at the old packets -- it takes them back in time and they get a real kick of that," he said.

The collector said he has received offers from [extremely dull] museums and other [trash hoarders], but he can't bring himself to sell his chip bags.

"The packets are mementos of my childhood," he said. "People have thrown big figures asking what it would take to buy the whole lot but it would take something spectacular," [he then paused, adding, "I'm so alone. I'm so very, very alone."]

Police Discover Live Cat "Marinating" In Trunk

Police say a traffic stop led to animal cruelty charges after they found a live cat "marinating" in the trunk of a car. Buffalo police say officers heard the cat meowing when they stopped 51-year-old Gary Korkuc of Cheektowaga to ticket him for running a stop sign Sunday night.

They say they checked the trunk and found 4-year-old Navarro in a cage, his fur covered with oil, crushed red peppers and chili peppers. Police say Korkuc told them he did it because Navarro was ill-tempered. Korkuc was charged with cruelty and released.

Police say he told them he was going to cook Navarro. But they say Korkuc also complained that the neutered male cat got pregnant after he was spayed.

COOL STUFF

"Venting" Probably Makes Your Anger Worse

Currupt Politician's Flow Chart: Will You Survive This Political Scandal?

Take These Tests And See If You're Prejudiced (Click "Demonstration")

Wikipedia's Lamest Edit Wars

How To Interpret Blood Spatters

Top 10 Worthless Limbs (& Other Vestigial Organs)

Waterbeds: What The Fuck Happened?