Weird News SkateboardA pointless collection of interesting links, strange news stories, and other amusing garbage discovered on the internet.
What's happening this time around? Street Signs Causing Dwarfism, Senior Citizens Eating Dog Food, Parachuting Donkeys, Homophobic Gunmen, & What Is Probably The Worst Job Of All Time.


Food Shelf Hands Out Dog Food To Seniors
A food bank in Clearwater, Fla., distributed a can labeled as a "superfood" that turned out to be a can of dog food, the recipient said. On Social Security, retired Air Force veteran Frank Viscido made his weekly trip from his home in Largo to the Religious Community Services Food Bank in Clearwater for free food.

Viscido was given the can labeled, "Senior Holistic Superfood" by a volunteer who noticed he wanted products for better health, the newspaper reported Friday.

"You're a senior. This ought to be good for you," Viscido remembered the man saying.
The label boasted glucosamine, beta carotene, vitamins and anti-oxidants for "sharp vision, strong Immune System, joint health, and healthy skin...and coat."
Chinese Street Sign Obviously Causes Dwarfism
Parents of a boy who has failed to grow after being born on Dwarf Street claim the name has jinxed their child. Four-year-old Liu Chengrui weighs just 11lb, and is two foot tall. The Chinese family's life savings have been spent on hospital treatment, but with no medical explanation found they believe their son has been affected by the bizarre name, and want the local council in Wuhan to change it.

Father Lu Chengrui said: "We have tried everything and nothing works. I'm now convinced that my son will end up as a dwarf unless we get the name of the street changed.

"It was irresponsible of the council to choose such a silly name. All the other children born at the same time are growing quickly, but my son has stayed the same.
Russians Tie Donkey To Parachute For Some Reason
Russian police have opened a criminal investigation into a group of entrepreneurs who tied a donkey to a parachute before sending the animal on a bizarre flight high above a popular Russian holiday resort. The tourism touts, in Russia's southern Krasnodar region, carried out the stunt in an attempt to get beachgoers to follow in the donkey's footsteps and pay to enjoy a similar parachute ride.

However, the publicity gimmick, which lasted half an hour, turned sour when the donkey began screaming in distress. Children watching from the beach started to cry. To make matters worse, the donkey had less than a soft landing and was dragged several feet over the surface of the Sea of Azov before being hauled on to the beach half-alive. According to local reports, children watching the spectacle asked their parents "Why did they tie a doggy to a parachute."

Police say they are now investigating whether the group of entrepreneurs responsible for the prank were guilty of animal cruelty.
Woman Accused Of Stuffing Burger Down Pants
Burger Down Pants
Around 10:30 a.m. Sunday, a Spartanburg County sheriff's deputy responded to a disturbance at the McDonald's at 500 Hearon Circle. When the deputy arrived, a McDonald's employee stated that an intoxicated woman was causing a disturbance inside the restaurant.

According to an incident report, Turner ordered two sandwiches and two small coffees. When a cashier gave Turner the bag with the sandwiches while her coffee was being prepared, the report states, Turner took one of the sandwiches out of the bag and stuffed it down her pants.

The employee told the deputy Turner then claimed she was shorted one sandwich, and began demanding another free one. When the store refused, the report states, Turner got belligerent so an employee called 911.

The deputy reported that when he arrived on the scene, he heard Turner screaming at the cashier to “give me the (expletive) sandwich.” When the deputy noticed a large grease stain on the front of Turner's pants, he asked Turner to remove the food but Turner said she didn't have anything in her pants, according to the report.
Warning: Do Not Mock A Homophobic Man's Vodka Bottle
Investigators said the host of a party allowed [an uninvited] man to enter early Sunday to avoid a confrontation, but the party-crasher became angry when revelers mocked his bottle of Nuvo vodka. An incident report said party guests told the man the "bottle looked like a lipstick cap, indicating that (he) is or was a homosexual, which made (him) upset."

Police said the man left the party and returned with a handgun, which he first fired into the air, then aimed shots at guests in the back yard.

The suspect fled the party and [one man] was taken to University Hospital in stable condition.
Chinese Kid Born With 12 Fingers, 12 Toes
12 Fingers China
A 12-year-old boy with 12 fingers and 12 toes won't be having surgey[sic] to remove his extra digits - because they are not affecting the functions of his hands and feet. Ouyang Guangchun, from Songpo village in southern China's Hunan province, is the only member of his family with the condition known as polydactylism.
It is not unusual for children to be born with additional digits, but it is rare for the extra digits to look and function normally.


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And it is with that nonsense that we take out leave of the internet for this week.
Goodnight sweet internet, wherever you are.

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